Monday, July 30, 2007

Boys will be boys

I read this article in Time today and needless to say I am pissed. And not just because it's a Monday.

It's funny how when women and girls make advances towards equity in this society, it is seen as some sort of decline for men and boys. You name it: math, science, college admissions, reading scores, pregnancy rates, employment, income, athletics, it's all a threat to the male position in society.

What about our boys?
With these advancements has come an onslaught of findings, theories, criticisms that raise questions about the status of the American boy. Boys are falling behind in the classroom, boys are dropping out, boys are underemployed, boys are committing suicide, boys are being emasculated.

Honestly: I don't give a fuck. Fuck them all. If men were to be eradicated tomorrow, I could care less. I really could. And this isn't some sort of hairy-legged, unshaven armpit dykey manifesto. This is I am sick and tired of patriarchy type of manifesto.

I am so over it. O-V-E-R it. I am biased. Biased against boys because I am a girl. And I don't really buy into theories about one gender being better than the other, or women excel at this and men do this more, blah, blah, blah. I don't. To each his own. Fuck science and every study that says otherwise. For every woman that is a good listener, there is one who is good at math and lift 300lbs over her head. For every man that works well with tools, you will find one that loves to write poetry and take long walks on the beach and such.

This "what about our boys?" debate is infused with homophobia, misogyny and patriarchal desires for the good ole days.

Which boys should we be worried about?
This debate is really about Black boys. Really. It's about them. White boys don't have much to worry about in this country. Black boys are the ones dropping out. They are the ones going to prison and killing themselves. Seriously.

So then, this isn't really all about gender. This is about race. And do you think that these are rich Black boys? Of course not. These are poor Black boys making this an issue of class as well.

To hear all the pundits (male and female), they never talk about this. They talk about boys in this general Opie Taylor sense. The reality is, the Opie's of America have two parents and middle class privileges. This is yet another way the dominant culture is masking the real issues of race and class in this society by trying to attack the progress of women and faulting it with the decline of male status.

Giving boys what they need
The article discusses what educators and social agents are trying to provide boys these days: special summer camps and same gender public schools. They argue that boys need to be free, use their hands, and have structured freedom so-to-speak.

Isn't this what all kids need? Since when do all girls like to sit on their asses all day and read fucking books? To argue that this is the best way for boys to learn is arguing that women can't be good at math, science, sports and the like, which we know isn't true. I believe in culturally appropriate approaches to learning, but to differentiate learning by gender is almost as bad as separate but equal tactics to education when it comes to race.

To every person that says boys need special environments in which to learn, I say go suck each and every one of their cocks, because I don't buy it. Don't all children deserve special and unique learning environments? I know that sounds like an oxymoron, but the education of our kids should be treated with special care. It's not like girls harbor some special force that allows them to transcend social barriers while boys sit and rot. Their ability to excel is certain areas is due to the fact that society is finally giving them the same fair shake at what men have always had.

This book should be banned and burned Fahrenheit 451 style
The Dangerous Book for Boys is some bullshit book that is all the rage among some educators, parents, and fathers' groups. It's all about teaching boys to be boys, light camp fires, learn about the solar system, insects, how to make things, etc.

Um, why are these topics limited to boys? Maybe Moxie wants to learn how to make a pinhole camera and pick out the best quotes from Shakespeare. This is some attempt to protect the masculinity of boys. To combat what feminists have done to the male ego. Boo fucking hoo. If I were a parent, I would purposely buy this book and make my daughters read it. You can never know too much about your enemy.

Also, there is this overall tone of homophobia in this search for masculinity. Is there something wrong with effeminate boys? Hardly. And some of the manliest men I know are big fucking homos.

I do suck at Math. My right brain is stronger.
So I do fit the stereotype for most women. Whatever, that is how fate and school wired me. This isn't to say that I don't know other women that can swim fast, do mental math, use a hammer or love cars like an Earnhardt.

When is society going to let it go and let girls and women succeed without hoopla around "protecting" the sanctity of the male bastion? When? When are we going to start looking at race seriously and deeply? When are we going to stop blaming feminists and start looking at class as the one thing that can divide or unite us over many fronts?

What about our boys? What about them? What about our girls? Their mothers? Their fathers? Their neighborhoods and communities? What about the big picture?

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