Raul is straight trippin'

Cuba is about to get futuristic and luxurious up in here: they can now stay in luxury hotels and buy all sorts of electronics that up until now were reserved for foreigners and companies.

Holy shit. Too bad most Cubans can't afford that stuff.

But - nevertheless - some people see this as progress. You can never tell by America media reports, but some Cubans feel like freedom is around the corner. But this woman put it best I think:

"Authorization to stay in hotels is fine because it was unfair discrimination of Cubans with respect to foreigners," said Tatiana, a doctor in the capital's Vedado district. "But, I have to ask, 'What Cubans can pay a night in a hotel with a normal salary?'"

I suppose you have to question progress that still leaves so many people in poverty. And what exactly is the benefit of buying more shit? Is the benefit having the option to buy more shit? I'm not sure how these deregulations will affect existing class tensions, but the pessimist in me is a little nervous.

My bleeding heart is apparently also cheap

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Apparently, liberals are less charitable than conservatives. In a study conducted by Arthur C. Brooks, author of "Who Really Cares: The Surprising Truth About Compassionate Conservatism", he found that liberals are less likely to give blood and donate less money to charities on average.

That's because conservatives regardless of income give all their money to the goddamn church. Further, liberals work at nonprofits - what is more fucking charitable than making charity your life's work?

The author (who is "independent" - THERE IS NO SUCH THING) argues that liberals replace stone cold cash with support for public giving and government programs. The problem he sees is that if we are so busy advocating for charity from the government, which may or may not work, we are hurting the "needy" (I hate that word much like I hate the phrase "inner city") because we ain't giving out of our own coffers.

Is he calling out liberals? Are we hypocrites? I see the numbers, but they don't reflect the complexity of real life. Liberals may live in richer districts, but as far as I can see the power still rest in the hands of a privilged, male few and those few don't look, think or act like me. If they're so damn charitable, why do we have war, homeless people, people without jobs, shoddy schools and no healthcare for everyone?

Yeah, that's what I thought. I'll keep writing my small checks and keep pushing the equality that everyone so justly deserves.

The United States isn't the only country with stupid shit going on

Tibetan monks excercising their human right to protest harsh conditions and oppression were assured by the Chinese government that they will not be punished for interrupting a government organized media tour. Hear that sound? That is the monks breathing a sigh of relief. Or me laughing my ass off at the audacity of the Chinese government.

That other sound you hear is the beep beep beep of cellular phones, which are now an approved device for Cuban common folk. Hi fives all around for Raul Castro. How happy is Cingular and Verizon right now? Wait...they can't operate there. And most Cubans can't afford cellies anyway, let alone customized Fergie ringers. Nevermind.

Ev"h"il can be cute and blonde

This girl hates you. If you are a woman, a person of color, poor, an immigrant, anti-war, not a Christian, working class, for the environment, or fat (taking a wild guess on that). Her Vag Card needs to be revoked. Why? Because her Daddy is John McCain and she's OK with that. Like, she's a Republican, too.

It is always so scary to see young, female Republicans. Meghan with an "h" and her Mommy, Cindy are scary blonde Republican women - protectors of the Patriarchy. Meghan a degree in art history (fake major like Philosophy) from Columbia. She is a rich, (presumably) spoiled girl from Arizona. (I was just in Arizona - the white women there are scary and apparently ultra conservative). She has this blog. I read bits and pieces of it and vomited in my mouth a little.

Most of the posts read something like this:

"Dear Diary, Dad just made another speech about how this war is totally awesome and that gays deserve to die. Daddy is so funny. Mommy and I were backstage when he promised a room full of old, white rich men that a woman's right to choose would be one of the first things he got rid of when he got elected to office. Yay! Chelsea Clinton is a fugly slut. I like Manolo's today. They are awesome. I'm awesome. Yay! Daddy's going to be President."

And other such musings. Her obliviousness to her privilege makes me laugh her crazy laugh. Then a chilled shudder runs down my spine when I think about all the people in this country like Meghan with an "h" and the power they have over my life.

Governor Follies in Puerto Rico

So the homeland of father is tackling yet another political mess. At least their governor didn't fuck prostitutes (at least that we know of). He's just being charged by the federalis for corruption in campaign financing. He surrendered to authorities today. Thanks. Anibal, you pretty much just handed the lunatic pro-Statehood politicians the next election, dammit.

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for the next Republican, gay twink scandal.

Messin' with White Women - Vogue Cover Edition

I don't like Lebron James. You know this. So when I heard about how he was going to "grace" the cover of Vogue's size and shape issue with Ms. Gisele Buchhoweverthehellyouspellherlastname, I was less than impressed. And apparently there is some controversy. (Size and shape issue? Really? And you put two tall, skinny people on the cover? How is this different than all the other covers?)

James looks like a big, Black Mandingo King Kong waiting to violate Gisele's white, pure womanhood.

Of course, there are people who say it's no big deal and people should stop being so sensitive. Of course, Lebron himself can't see how the white media is making him out to be a dancing monkey.

Whatever. If people in America had any sense of media literacy, they would know that the picture evokes all sorts of sordid, historical racial missteps in our country's history. Quite frankly, I'm rather disappointed that the picture was taken by one Annie Leibovitz, famed photographer (and white lesbian) who has shot everyone but Jesus Christ himself (and that's only cuz there was a scheduling conflict with his second coming and her book release.)

She could have done better.

And the world continues to turn.

Beep Beep goes the BS meter - Angola landmine pageant edition

In an effort to restore the self-esteem and confidence of female land mine survivors, the country of Angola is hosting the "Miss Landmine Survivor" contest on April 2 in some luxury hotel.

I wonder if this is one of those pageants where everyone is a winner....what the hell is the criteria anyway? What do you win besides a sash and crown? Who judges this? What are the categories?

Pertinent questions for a stupid ass endeavor. How about you empower them with some jobs and homes and landmine free territory? That would be real special. Maybe empower them to speak up for themselves and advocate for their rights and safety. They can still wear the sash if it makes them feel pretty.

Shocked, but not awed

Mission Accomplished indeed.

This scores a 25 on the 1 to 10 scale of my bullshit meter

"I'm not going to refer someone to a hit man to put to death someone that's inconvenient in their life," says Joseph DeCook, a retired Ob/Gyn from Holland, Mich., and vice-president of the American Association of Pro-life Obstetricians and Gynecologists. "I wouldn't do that. This is the very same thing. I'm not going to refer a pregnant woman to a physician who will purposefully terminate her pregnancy — better known as purposefully kill the unborn child. I'm just not going to do it."

Who gave the Mr. DeCook his medical license? Really? Quick: take it back.

He is responding to news that the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists released new guidelines saying that physicians who object to providing things like abortions and emergency contraception for moral reasons should make a referral to a provider who will. If not, they could lose their license. The feds stepped in to question whether or not such guidelines violate federal laws that protect asshole physicians who prevent women from getting the services they need and deserve.

The fucking feds....are sooo concerned, yet again, with my vagina and its attached pieces and parts that they can ignore an economic meltdown, a war or two and a health care crisis. Clearly preventing rape victims from accessing emergency contraception and such are more important. I like how its a MAN who they quote in opposition of this. The irony of that couldn't fit in an 18-wheeler. I should start protesting vasectomies and Viagra. Since he seems to know so much about women's health, I guess I know a thing or two about penises and scrotums.

I just have one question for Mr. DeCock DeCook: You won't "hit man to put to death someone that's inconvenient", I wonder how you feel about this war?

If by unique and brave you mean predictable and reheated

Get off his nutsack, people. Really. His speech, while simple and eloquent was nothing more than regurgitated rhetoric that I have heard before. Hell, said before. Of course a person who is the product of two races can talk "openly" ""bravely" and "candidly" about building bridges. I can't believe the delusion that people are operating under. These must be the same people who that "Crash" was the most groundbreaking piece of American cinema ever.

So he acknowledged that the races are angry and resentful towards each other. Big deal. Who doesn't know that? He pointed out that both "sides" to this divide need to own up to their mistakes and show some empathy. Yeah...not new. Not novel concepts.

Like, am I the only person in America who almost fell asleep reading and listening to this speech? Am I?

Of course his choice of reconcilliation and coming together sounds good to most people and by most people I mean white people because it assauges their fucking guilt and allows them to freely and comfortably point the finger back at minorities. People like this will love his speech because he uses some of that pull yourself up talk that privileged people love to toss out to those who aint got much. Yes, class is important and should unite us. However, all the things that he listed as affecting all Americans: health care, war, jobs, etc. still disproportionately affect people of color (Blacks and Latinos) and when you break that down, WOMEN.

So I can concede that he has several valid points, but please please please don't worship at the altar of Bama because he had nothing new or groundbreaking to say.

Purity rings for half off with purchase

Retail therapy can be good; especially when you buy a shirt just to make fun of the people who really wear it with conviction and good intentions. I purchased this tee from this place. Never has God and Evangelical/Born Again Christianity been so darn cool.

Hint Hint

I wear an XL.

I smell an online purchase coming...

Reality Check: Wall Street Edition

Gosh, if a reality check isn't due right now, I don't know what is.

The Street on Welfare
By E. J. Dionne Jr.Tuesday, March 18, 2008; Page A19

Never do I want to hear again from my conservative friends about how brilliant capitalists are, how much they deserve their seven-figure salaries and how government should keep its hands off the private economy.

The Wall Street titans have turned into a bunch of welfare clients. They are desperate to be bailed out by government from their own incompetence, and from the deregulatory regime for which they lobbied so hard. They have lost "confidence" in each other, you see, because none of these oh-so-wise captains of the universe have any idea what kinds of devalued securities sit in one another's portfolios.

So they have stopped investing. The biggest, most respected investment firms threaten to come crashing down. You can't have that. It's just fine to make it harder for the average Joe to file for bankruptcy, as did that wretched bankruptcy bill passed by Congress in 2005 at the request of the credit card industry. But the big guys are "too big to fail," because they could bring us all down with them.

Enter the federal government, the institution to which the wealthy are not supposed to pay capital gains or inheritance taxes. Good God, you don't expect these people to trade in their BMWs for Saturns, do you?

In a deal that the New York Times described as "shocking," J.P. Morgan Chase agreed over the weekend to pay $2 a share to buy all of Bear Stearns, one of the brand names of finance capitalism. The Federal Reserve approved a $30 billion -- that's with a "b" -- line of credit to make the deal work.

I don't fault Ben Bernanke, the Fed chairman, for being so interventionist in trying to save the economy. On the contrary, Bernanke deserves credit for ignoring all the extreme free-market bloviation. He doesn't want the economy to collapse on his watch, so he is willing to violate all the conservatives' shibboleths about the dangers of government intervention. As a voter once told the legendary political journalist Richard Rovere: "Sometimes you have to forget your principles to do what's right."

But if this near meltdown of capitalism doesn't encourage a lot of people to question the principles they have carried in their heads for the past three decades or so, nothing will.
We had already learned the hard way -- in the crash of 1929 and the Depression that followed -- that capitalism is quite capable of running off the rails. Franklin Roosevelt's New Deal was a response to the failure of the geniuses of finance (and their defenders in the economics profession) to realize what was happening or to fix it in time.

As the economist John Kenneth Galbraith noted of the era leading up to the Depression, "The threat to men of great dignity, privilege and pretense is not from the radicals they revile; it is from accepting their own myth. Exposure to reality remains the nemesis of the great -- a little understood thing."

But in the enthusiasm for deregulation that took root in the late 1970s, flowered in the Reagan era and reached its apogee in the second Bush years, we forgot the lesson that government needs to keep a careful watch on what capitalists do. Of course, some deregulation can be salutary, and the market system is, on balance, a wondrous instrument -- when it works. But the free market is just that: an instrument, not a principle.

In 1996, back when he was a Republican senator from Maine, William Cohen told me: "We have been saying for so long that government is the enemy. Government is the enemy until you need a friend."

So now the bailouts begin, and Wall Street usefully might feel a bit of gratitude, perhaps by being willing to have the wealthy foot some of the bill or to acknowledge that while its denizens were getting rich, a lot of Americans were losing jobs and health insurance. I'm waiting.

Wright is Right

Rev. Jeremiah Wright is right. Don't be mad at him for speaking aloud what many Blacks (including myself) often think about whites and our situation in America. Lots of voters apparently didn't like what had to say. The truth hurts sometimes.

Many white people actually think we have achieved equality. That sentiment is as asinine as the notion that women aren't treated as the sex class, regulated to second tier status. So anytime a Black person reminds the nation of our sordid past and how it has affected our present and will affect our future, he or she is called "stupid" or stuck in a "time warp".

And this is where I have a problem with Senator Obama. In an effort to conduct damage control and prevent white supporters from feeling hurt or attacked, he pushes away the man who married him and baptized his daughters. That is what keeping real gets you sometimes. In his effort to be a Black man in the White House, he sounds like a fucking apologist.

"Aww shucks, massa, he don't mean not nothin he say. Dat Reverund done gone crazy. Hes sorry. I iz sorry."

His "let's move beyond racial divisions" rhetoric makes me want to vomit. Obama wears his race like I wear a coat. I eat, sleep and breathe Black Woman every fucking day of my life. I am so aware of the contradictory duality that my invisibility and my subjection to white scrutiny that its laughable (in that padded room sorta way) when I hear mulatto men such as Senator Obama talk about moving past history and look ahead...to what? To a time and place where white guilt doesn't exist?

Never.

Reconciliation is a long time coming. Ask the South Africans. Ask the Bosnians and the Serbs and the Tibetans. Ask the Incas and the Mayas and the First Peoples of North America.

The consequences of white oppression and dominance can be felt the world over. There is no excusing that. There are corporations and family fortunes flourishing today that were built on the backs of Black slaves. In my mother's lifetime she couldn't use the same water fountain as a white person. In her lifetime, she went to segregated schools. I graduated from a high school that less than 40 years ago had race riots because the white people in that neighborhood didn't want Blacks there. I know this because a woman who taught my freshman English class was one of those unwanted Blacks.

The prison system is overflowing with Blacks. Black girls and women are under served in the health system, but have the highest rates of STIs and HIV. Everything from the mortgage crisis to natural disasters to fucking digital television conversion affect Blacks at higher rates than whites.

You have got to be fucking kidding me when you tell me that race is rhetoric and that me need to move on. You are telling me to walk away from the very thing that has shaped my existence (good and bad) from day fucking one.

Rev. Wright doesn't speak for everyone, but he is certainly speaking the truth.

Your good news just blew up my bullshit meter

According to this Associated Press article, the U.S. military is experiencing fewer sexual assault reports. Yeah right. After this little incident, I would be afraid to make a report, too. But seriously, this is the biggest crock of shit that I have read TODAY (because I know I read some crock o'shit yesterday). Survivors of rape in the military experience a second rape when the try to report incidences and many are subject to demotions, early dismissals and harassment. When some women are trying to make the military their career, what choice do they have but to keep mum?

Scissors, games, military. You know what to do.

I tip a forty to his memory....

Senator Howard Metzenbaum passed away yesterday. He was the people's main nigga. Lower some flags up in dis bitch, yo.

Infidelity leads to history-making

La La La La La. Lalalala. La. LA.

Hmph.

Allow me to be so blunt, (Soon-to-be former) Governor Spitzer: You lost everything over some pussy. Some expensive call girl type pussy. Some expensive call girl type pussy that you got the DAY BEFORE VALENTINE'S DAY. And not only did you get some illegal pussoi, you got it outside the confines of marriage. You cheated on your wife. Good lord, how could you be so stupid? The irony of it all...you with your prostitution ring busts that got you into power. Why why oh WHY did you have to be a Democrat? Thanks to you, we have forgotten about all the gay Republican scandals. Daaaammmit.

We all know that politicans and prostitutes go hand in hand like PB&J, but why did you have to get caught? How's Kirsten doing, BTW? I heard from the recordings that you asked her to do some pre-tty dirrrty things, young man. Preeeeety...wasn't "not safe" a phrase she used?

And she wasn't even one of the expensive ones. How cheap of you. (or her...I can't tell)

Maybe Silda can call up Hillary and get some advice. Maybe Silda has a political career launched because of you.

I'll tell you who definitely has one now: Lt. Gov. David Paterson, the FIRST (legally blind?) BLACK GOVERNOR OF New Yawk. Hell yes. (P.S. DO NOT fuck this up, Dave. I mean it.) I wonder what his seeing eye dog will wear to the swearing in.

I mean...who would have thought that at the moment you were deep-dicking some prostitute, you were setting off a chain of events that would ultimately lead to the First Black Governor of the State of New York?

I love these moments in Black history.

Messin' with white girls

The Root.com takes an interesting look at a law that could affect this whole Spitzer catastrophe. The Mann Act prohibits transporting across state lines "a woman or girl for the purpose of prostitution or debauchery, or for any other immoral purpose." So if prostitutes who are based in New York were meeting him in DC, then that's a crime.

The Mann Act is pretty damn old and in 1910 the government used it to prosecute a Black boxer named Jack Johnson. They hated the fact that he was a heavyweight champion (so better than all the white boxers) and he had penchant for white women. He married two and was cheating on his second wife with another woman when he was charged by the government for violating the man act when he sent his mistress a railroad ticket.

The feds even got some exes of his to testify in court against him (I guess for travelling with them across state lines and screwing them. Premaritally of course. Not that whites and Blacks could get married in most states.) and he was sentenced to one year and a day for his love of white women. He avoided his sentence for awhile, fleeing around the globe with his white fiance, but eventually they caught him and he served his sentence.

Ha. I can't be angry about this. His athletic triumphs lead to race riots after he beat racist asswipe James Jeffried who wanted to prove "a white man is better than a Negro". He lost. So whites went to lynching and beating Black people all over the country. And what does JJ do? He fucks white women. I know, I know: dey wuz tryin' to keep da Black man down, but da Black man shouldn't ignore racial violence and tension by openly preferring white women, using them as trophies. He was a sexist asshole.

To even consider him a hero is ridiculous. So if the Root thought it was making an example of his persecution, it can try again.

I love these moments in Black history.

Here we go again: Gay legislation edition

A piece of legislation that would ban discrimination based on sexual orientation is up in the Ohio House again. This time, supporters of the bill expect it to pass because we have a supportive Governor in the statehouse.

I'm excited, of course, but I think it is funny that the one gay state rep, Michael Skindell, is not one of the prime sponsors of the bill. Dale Miller is. On the other hand, I think it is cool that the homo rep is not the lead on this and your average straight white guy is. Just thought that odd.

What's even more odd is Barry Sheets, from Citizens for Community Values thinks the legislation is "asking for trouble". He has "concerns about carving out special rights for people based upon whom they choose to be engaged in a physical relationship with". He also thinks:

"That just does not seem to be a good use of the General Assembly's time or focus when we have so many other looming problems." He said the measure is "an issue I believe that's looking for a problem. "I don't see that the public would see that there's a very large need for this."

Really, Mister Douchebag O'Hitler...Mr. Barry Sheets?

This whole situation is pretty damn gay.

Food prices around the world

Really cool look by the BBC at how rising food costs affect differently families around the world. The one thing these people have in common is that the women are responsible for securing and preparing the foods their families eat. Even if they work outside the home. The one white family in the UK is of course, doing just fine.

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun: Tuesday edition

Where, oh, where do I start this bitchfest?

Shall I start with this fucked up piece of legislation that infringes on Native American women's access to abortion? Maybe.

Or, I could start with this article that talks about the health risks women of color face in the United States and the service disparities they experience in the healthcare system. This article stems off to talk about the prevalence of STI's among adolescent girls. And you guessed it: Black girls are disproportionately represented in this number. My only question is this: unless all these girls are lesbians, who is transmitting these diseases to them?

I could talk about this uplifting piece covering efforts by Queen Mothers in Ghana to inform women about abortion rights and access, safe sex and abstinence.

I could, or you could just click the links your damn self.

I'm jumping, jumping

Miss Gulag

If you are a female inmate in this Siberian prison, you could earn an early release by participating in a beauty pageant. Yes, a prison beauty pageant. Now I remember hearing about this pageant some time ago, but the BBC has a new "This World" special about the pageant and the women involved in it.

I'm not sure where to start with this...what is bad and what is good about it. Pageants in general are bullshit, so I am dubious to the fact that they are being used to help inmates earn an early release based on good behavior. On the other hand, these women get so invested into these pageants and not only would they win a crown, they will most likely earn a ticket out of jail. Not that life after prison is that great.

Another example of what happens when violent men are allowed to slip through The System

Here's another one: estranged crazy boyfriend kills his ex-girlfriend. And her daughter (she just got accepted to college and was going to be lawyer). And her son. Oh, I shouldn't forget the part about how he raped the mother and daughter and beat all three them in the head execution style with a 2lb hammer.

He was convicted. Thank God. Three life sentences. But the part that gets me is that he had a history of violence against women and yet he was still on the streets. He had priors on sexual assault and abuse. Witnesses during the trail said that his relationship with the victim was rocky. Yet he wasn't stop until she was dead. And her children. And of course, you can't kill a woman without raping her first.

Times likes these I can't argue against capital punishment.

Black Thursday

Thanks to Mademoiselle Kitty leading me to the news goldmine of hilarity. Comments in BOLD.

Bill Cosby issues a challenge at Mount Zion of Oakwood Village
Thursday, March 06, 2008
David Briggs and Stan Donaldson
Plain Dealer Reporters

Oakwood- Actor and author Bill Cosby challenged members of Greater Cleveland's black community Wednesday to take responsibility for themselves and their children. [GOOD LUCK WITH THAT ONE, BILL.]

The 70-year-old advocate told them not to turn away from the problems of teenage pregnancy, crime and school dropout rates that lead to misery over generations.

Cosby, who has been criticized for drawing attention to problems in the black community, also addressed the sensitive issue of sexual abuse of boys and girls by black men.

"Your dirty laundry is out there. I'm telling you it's time to wash," Cosby told a crowd of several hundred who packed Mount Zion Oakwood Village. [NICE METAPHOR. NOW AFTER THEY WASH THIS METAPHORICAL DIRTY LAUNDRY WILL YOU BE MAD IF THEY HANG IT ALL OUT TO DRY ON THEIR FRONT PORCH?]

Earlier, he spoke at Cuyahoga Community College in Cleveland.

His tough-love message, mixed with humor, was embraced by the civic, political, educational and religious leaders and laypeople at Mount Zion.

Before his talk, civic leaders pledged to "work toward health care, nutrition, child care, education, housing and other basic needs together that provide a decent standard of living." [PLEDGE = CROCK OF SHIT.]

The Rev. Marvin McMickle, chairman of United Pastors in Mission, one of the sponsors of the event, reminded the gathering, "We are not here just to see a celebrity. We are here because the celebrity is challenging us to look at ourselves."

And challenge Cosby did, taking on parents who are afraid to discipline their children and adults who would rather look past the ills facing the black community than address them.

"What do you care what white people think?" he asked. "If you did care, there would be no housing projects. We'd have houses. We'd have stores. We'd have banks." [UM...GEE, WHERE TO START WITH THIS ONE? IF WHITE PEOPLE CARED PERIOD, WE'D HAVE THESE THINGS, TOO. BUT REALLY, WHAT DOES THE PROSPERITY OF THE BLACK COMMUNITY HAVE TO DO WITH WHITE PEOPLE IN THE END? I MEAN, WE SHOULDN'T CARE WHAT WHITE PEOPLE THINK ABOUT US, WE NEED TO CARE ABOUT WHAT THEY DO TO US....I'M CERTAINLY NOT HERE TO IMPRESS SOME WHITE PEOPLE. VERY PERPLEXING STATEMENT THERE BILL.]

When someone in the choir said, "Watch out," Cosby responded, to applause, "No, I'm not watching out. I'm going to tell it."

Talking about sexual abuse of children, Cosby said, "I'm saying now: Enough. Enough. Protect these children. It's on you. It's on you."

At Tri-C, about 400 people heard Cosby talk about the importance of education.

Plain Dealer reporter Sam Fulwood moderated the event. He asked Cosby about education, youth and if the actor thought his message was making an impact.

"These kids are lost," Cosby said. "They have no clear idea of the old mantra that used to be put on the youth."

While Cosby criticized poor parenting, the influence of rap music and the mental state of youth with his trademark humor, he also took on those who have criticized his opinions about the state of black America.

"We have so many people saying these people can't do this . . . look at the story of Phillis Wheatley. Look up the story of Frederick Douglass," Cosby said. [THESE ARE THE BEST EXAMPLES HE COULD COME UP WITH? WHILE GREAT, NOT REALISTIC FOR KIDS THESE DAYS. HA. I JUST SAID, "KIDS THESE DAYS", I'M OLD.]

Homer Gates, 46, of Cleveland, brought his 14-year-old twin sons Marvelous and Wonderful to hear Cosby.

"It was a good chance for them to see a positive brother and to know that they can be anything they want to be if they put their mind to it," he said. [THEY CAN BE ANYTHING PEOPLE NAMED "MARVELOUS" AND "WONDERFUL" CAN BE. TO MY KNOWLEDGE DRAG QUEENS AND STRIPPERS ARE ALL I CAN THINK OF.]

------------

Around the time I got this news lead from MK, I just finished the following conversation with a coworker of mine:

Coworker: Your hands are bigger than mine. You have long fingers.
Moxie: Yikes, and they're dry, too. I need to moisturize.
C: I have some lotion. I'm ashy, too!
Moxie: No, I will use my Black people moisturizer on my desk.
C: Like, COCOA BUTTER? I crack up everytime I think about you telling me about Black people and cocoa butter.
Moxie: Yeah, white people aren't allowed to use it.
C: Oh! Hey, what if I came to work one day with Black people makeup on?? Like only on my face and my neck would still be white? That would be crazy!
Coworker 2 (upon overhearing): Um...white people used to do that because they thought it was funny. It wasn't very nice.
Moxie: It's called Black Face. You never heard of that?
C: NO. People really did that to Black people?
Moxie: (laughing) Uh, yeah.
C2: You're so young. Of course you wouldn't know about that.
Moxie: I'm young enough to not have experienced it either! (to coworker 1): I'm going to have you watch Eyes on the Prize.
C: What is that?
Moxie: An award-winning documentary about Blacks post-slavery and the Civil Rights Movement.
C: (exasperated) Is it long?
Moxie: Might be longer than Roots, so yeah, its pretty long.
C: What's Roots?

(Moxie walks away and finds email from MK.)

The way you handle that Swiffer is getting me all hot and bothered to perform my wifely duties

So apparently all women need to do to get their male partners to contribute more to household work and child rearing is to fuck them more. So says this psychologist who spoke about the release of this study about house chores and the gender divide at home.

Wash the dishes + fold the laundry = blow job with the chance of anal play.

Well, gosh, if only we'd known these a century ago, this whole equality movement could have been done by now.

To be fair, the study that was recently released about this issue is more about the shifting roles in the home: men are finally increasing their home contributions while women are working more outside the home. The correlation makes sense and hints at a progressive march towards equity.

But then there is this fuckedupedness that comes with it saying that if women would put out as some sort of thank you/acknowledgement of men actually doing their fucking jobs, it would help increase this shifting dynamic towards fully shared housework. In fact, if men did their share, sex would follow:

Joshua Coleman, a San Francisco-area psychologist and author of "The Lazy Husband: How to Get Men to Do More Parenting and Housework," said equitable sharing of housework can lead to a happier marriage and more frequent sex.

Wow, Josh. Someone gave you a medical degree. It's not that I don't follow the logic. But, yet again women are put in the situation of using pussy as some sort of currency...the venerable, lusty Dangling Carrot in front of the Male Ass.

And it gets better: this household equity is more prevalent in white families than Black ones because what do you know? Black women are doing more work in and out of the home. I think that's been the case since...oh, I don't know...the inception of slavery? Pick the cotton, cook the meals, fuck the master, bear the children, wash mistress' dirty panties....yeah, sounds familiar.

Her name was Kate.

Violence Against Women Story of the Day comes from the UK. This man meets a woman at a bar. They exchange numbers and they go out on a date days later. He stabs her to death. Like 31 times in the neck. Takes her body. Dumps it in the trunk of her car. Drives around town in the car. Calls his girlfriend (not only a murderer, a cheating bastard) and acts like nothing happened. He eventually strips her body naked and dumps in some wooded area (of course). Her decomposed body is found days later.

His defense: she stabbed herself because she was suicidal. Really? Really. He was convicted. Good. She was smart: they met in a public area. She told friends where she would be. She's still dead. The most amusing (in a sad, pathetic way) part of the article comes from these two people:

Ann Ellidge, from the Suzy Lamplugh Trust, said Kate's death was all the more shocking because "Kate was already doing the right thing in meeting a public place and keeping in touch with her friends".

She said: "We can't tell what happened in her case but our advice would always be that if someone makes you feel the least bit wary you should make an excuse and leave." Matt Searle, from the Lucie Blackman Trust, said: "At the end of a date you should never feel under pressure to leave with someone or go to their home. If they are a good man then they will wait a few days and send you flowers."

Gee, thanks, Matt. Men who send you flowers won't hurt you. Yes, that's the clincher.

Yeah, that whole anti-capitalist thing is really working out for me....

Not really. Just caved in to my obsession with bath & body products and bought this stuff. It's so luxurious. And the company is owned by a Black Lady Chick like me. I feel good supporting her and helping her live the wealthy life she always wanted....

My skin loves this stuff. People who love my skin love this stuff, too.

Um, but you're the dumb ass that thought it would cure a cold

So people finally realized that Airborne is um...just a vitamin. And not a good one at that. For their stupidity they will get reimbursements in a suit that settled for $23.3 million.

Yeah, it's that kind of day

Blowing the dust off this thing: The Return of Twisty

My day started off OK: I woke up. But in general I am feeling pretty pissy. It's Election Day here in Ohio, so enough said about that. Then my ex-girlfriend calls up and mentions my ex-friend by name and the thought of him makes my insides boil. So after honing in on my newly acquired yoga practices, I took some deep breaths and went here. Then, when that didn't help, I went here. I don't know why because I knew Twisty hadn't posted in what felt like ages. But low and behold, there were new posts! And I made the following (self) discoveries:

- Eating meat is indeed anti-feminist. Here's why, according to Twisty:

"A couple of years ago I got called on the carpet by a vegetarian blamer who was deeply grossed out by blogular photographs of my meaty lunches. At the time I demurred, not having fully worked out the connection between women’s oppression and the global megameatyocracy. But today I lounge before you in my lime green recliner and declare that there is no legitimate argument on behalf of consuming corporate meat. Convenience is not a legitimate argument. Price is not a legitimate argument. The delicious flavor of applewood smoked bacon is not a legitimate argument. Tradition is not a legitimate argument. Culture is not a legitimate argument.

Culture, as a matter of fact, is never a legitimate argument for anything. Fuck culture."

"....It is a documented fact that whenever human beings are given authority over lower-status beings — whether the lower status beings are cattle or women or slaves or prisoners of war — those in authority are unable to contain their vicious impulses and quickly morph into sadistic amoral assholes. This is a cornerstone of patriarchy."

Genius. Pure genius. She goes on to reference this guy (a lawyer no less) that basically makes the connection between post-modern feminism and it's compliance in animal meat consumption and objectification of women.

I guess in my effort to detest all things hippie and green, I missed the point that eating meat is cruel. It is an abuse of my place in the ecosystem. My concession: I will give up land animal and continue to eat water animals (except lobster and crab). I'm not ready to go vegan because I love butter, milk and cheese and honey waaay too much. In time...

- Postmodern (third-wave) feminism is funfeminism...fake feminism. Feminism-lite. Pop Feminism. I am a postmodern feminist.

When I read Twisty, I realize just how un-feminist I really am. How lame am I to think that my love of the color pink is cool and ironic? "Look at me, I'm pro-choice and I like the color pink. Aren't I making a bold statement?"

But beyond that (and eating meat), I keep trying to justify the sex industry. I try to justify shopping at Target. I also try to justify why shaving my legs is soooo my choice because I just don't like body hair. I wear make-up practically everyday. I care more about weighing less than eating healthy. I still somehow find men necessary to my existence. I've had wedding fantasies.

Self reality check in progress. I let my feminist ideals wilt under patriarchy. I get that now. So, here's my concession:

I shop at Target and will probably continue to do so. My place in the capitalist clusterfuck called the Western Hemisphere is almost inescapable. However, I will continue to guilt myself as if I were named Mary Teresa Silverstein and explore ways to lessen my dependence on corporate America.

I do like the color pink because it does look good on me, despite being typical and totally gendered. I don't have to hate the color, just what it stands for.

I will learn to be comfortable with myself. I will limit my efforts to be perceived as attractive to men (or anyone for that matter). I will stop deluding myself into thinking porn is OK. I will continue to call out white women because someone has to do that.

I will read more.

I will acknowledge my privileges everyday in some way.

I will stop insisting that feminist movements need men, because they don't. I will stop being a male apologist.

I will not, however, stop loving me some Jesus. I understand that radical feminism rejects most organized religion - especially Christianity - but I can't give up the notion that Jesus Christ is so damn awesome. He lived by simple, yet universal principles that if we all could accept, internalize and practice, we'd all live in a better place. Wherever that place may be....

I also need to not work for an organization that supports capitalism. I really need to not do that. Note to self: find new job....

All this reality-checking is making me sleepy.