Blowing the dust off this thing: The Return of Twisty

My day started off OK: I woke up. But in general I am feeling pretty pissy. It's Election Day here in Ohio, so enough said about that. Then my ex-girlfriend calls up and mentions my ex-friend by name and the thought of him makes my insides boil. So after honing in on my newly acquired yoga practices, I took some deep breaths and went here. Then, when that didn't help, I went here. I don't know why because I knew Twisty hadn't posted in what felt like ages. But low and behold, there were new posts! And I made the following (self) discoveries:

- Eating meat is indeed anti-feminist. Here's why, according to Twisty:

"A couple of years ago I got called on the carpet by a vegetarian blamer who was deeply grossed out by blogular photographs of my meaty lunches. At the time I demurred, not having fully worked out the connection between women’s oppression and the global megameatyocracy. But today I lounge before you in my lime green recliner and declare that there is no legitimate argument on behalf of consuming corporate meat. Convenience is not a legitimate argument. Price is not a legitimate argument. The delicious flavor of applewood smoked bacon is not a legitimate argument. Tradition is not a legitimate argument. Culture is not a legitimate argument.

Culture, as a matter of fact, is never a legitimate argument for anything. Fuck culture."

"....It is a documented fact that whenever human beings are given authority over lower-status beings — whether the lower status beings are cattle or women or slaves or prisoners of war — those in authority are unable to contain their vicious impulses and quickly morph into sadistic amoral assholes. This is a cornerstone of patriarchy."

Genius. Pure genius. She goes on to reference this guy (a lawyer no less) that basically makes the connection between post-modern feminism and it's compliance in animal meat consumption and objectification of women.

I guess in my effort to detest all things hippie and green, I missed the point that eating meat is cruel. It is an abuse of my place in the ecosystem. My concession: I will give up land animal and continue to eat water animals (except lobster and crab). I'm not ready to go vegan because I love butter, milk and cheese and honey waaay too much. In time...

- Postmodern (third-wave) feminism is funfeminism...fake feminism. Feminism-lite. Pop Feminism. I am a postmodern feminist.

When I read Twisty, I realize just how un-feminist I really am. How lame am I to think that my love of the color pink is cool and ironic? "Look at me, I'm pro-choice and I like the color pink. Aren't I making a bold statement?"

But beyond that (and eating meat), I keep trying to justify the sex industry. I try to justify shopping at Target. I also try to justify why shaving my legs is soooo my choice because I just don't like body hair. I wear make-up practically everyday. I care more about weighing less than eating healthy. I still somehow find men necessary to my existence. I've had wedding fantasies.

Self reality check in progress. I let my feminist ideals wilt under patriarchy. I get that now. So, here's my concession:

I shop at Target and will probably continue to do so. My place in the capitalist clusterfuck called the Western Hemisphere is almost inescapable. However, I will continue to guilt myself as if I were named Mary Teresa Silverstein and explore ways to lessen my dependence on corporate America.

I do like the color pink because it does look good on me, despite being typical and totally gendered. I don't have to hate the color, just what it stands for.

I will learn to be comfortable with myself. I will limit my efforts to be perceived as attractive to men (or anyone for that matter). I will stop deluding myself into thinking porn is OK. I will continue to call out white women because someone has to do that.

I will read more.

I will acknowledge my privileges everyday in some way.

I will stop insisting that feminist movements need men, because they don't. I will stop being a male apologist.

I will not, however, stop loving me some Jesus. I understand that radical feminism rejects most organized religion - especially Christianity - but I can't give up the notion that Jesus Christ is so damn awesome. He lived by simple, yet universal principles that if we all could accept, internalize and practice, we'd all live in a better place. Wherever that place may be....

I also need to not work for an organization that supports capitalism. I really need to not do that. Note to self: find new job....

All this reality-checking is making me sleepy.