Monday, May 19, 2008

Future Tool of America: John Tyler Hammons

Meet John Tyler Hammons, the newly-elected mayor of Muskogee, OK. Not that much of value ever comes out of that state, but John is news because he's 19. He's making records because of his young age and newly acquired position. I smelled Republican and of course, he is. In fact, he is the youngest at-large delegate for the Republican convention. He aspires to be governor of Okiehoma one day. And of course he wants to be President once he's governor.

Douche Quote: "Right now I'm between girlfriends," he said, "so I'm looking to fill that position."

Proof that there is little difference between a donkey and an elephant: "The senior class president at Muskogee High School in 2007, he served as president of both the Young Republicans and the Young Democrats clubs. "I threw my name in both rings ... and lo and behold, both groups elected me," he said."

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